Tuesday, February 17


[ . from Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women]

the group moniker is highly clever. i could already imagine the trouble my friends would have if i joined it. what hypocrisy, claiming to be a pub-goer. but i thought the pink chaddi (basically, underpants) was a brilliant fling in the face(s) of the sri ram sena.

plus, enemy credentials cant be too disputable for lack of fulfilling one adjective. if one is loose and forward, then she (men, you understand this only applies to the fairer and weaker sex) most probably visits pubs, the bastions of dank sinfulness. the converse is more true, for 'to do' or 'participate' is stronger than merely 'to think' or 'be so'. if one is found in a pub, whether or not that place actually meets the criteria for being a propah pub, then she is most definitely very loose and so forward she'll without a doubt fall flat on her face sometime later in life (bringing down the entire name of her family and forebears) unless we rein her in and slap her down.

hitting nightspots, wearing flatteringly clothes (ironic how the tighter your attire, the looser you're sposed to be) and speaking a lil too loud, too much is probably a triple heart attack to a real sri ram-er. i imagine they'd be ready to raze g-strings off if they see such 'happening, loose and forward' women on a mass scale, in stranger permutations. i'd like an interview with one of them. i'd like to fly one of them over. or fly with them to hollywood-la-la-land (where i spose most degrading cultures originate). of course, to get on his (could there be 'hers' in the sri ram sena?) good side, i'd be wearing my best loosest sari (to show how uptight i am).

Pramod Mutalik, the SRS leader, said at the time that his followers were “custodians of Indian culture” who had prevented the women at the pub from going astray. He has vowed to force unmarried couples found together on Valentine’s Day to either get married or to tie rakhis – string bracelets – on their wrists signifying that they are brother and sister.

Other officials have voiced support for the idea that is “unIndian” for women to visit pubs – or even to hold hands with men in public. “We definitely condemn the incident where women were attacked but the pub culture must stop,” Anbumani Ramadoss, the Health Minister, said last month.

back to the pants. i wonder how many piles of these pink chaddis have winged (eheh, wing) their way to Pramod Muthalik. Does he seethe in anger at the pink hordes? And given that he finds it distasteful and very "unindian" for (indian?) women to traipse around town, would he be turned on or off by the sight of so many female intimates?

Also, does he have facebook? His PR assistant should hook him up, and have him read the wall posts in the group. This would allow him a better view of the challenges he faces in reel in loose women and unmarried couples on valentines day, even if only in Karnataka.

Sidenote. If Paris Hilton turned Indian, can you imagine how many millions the global (because you know, one individual here does affect the economy there) economy would lose if she weren't allowed to booze and shop her way through many nights and days. "It's really scary about the economy right now. So the way I'm playing my part in helping is doing a lot of shopping wherever I go."